A Bloke's Guide to Saving Money: How to Be Skint, Stingy and Strangely Satisfied
By Owen Croft - the same cantankerous, twice-divorced, sofa-duct-tape enthusiast who wrote The Blokes Cook BookListen up, you glorious tight-fisted heathen.This isn't some shiny-suited, latte-sipping finance prick telling you to cancel Netflix and invest in avocado futures. This is a proper, no-bullshit survival bible for the common man who considers ?60 a "big night out" and measures wealth in how many days he can go without turning the heating on.
Owen Croft - a man who's been skint since the day he was born, proudly wears jeans older than most TikTok influencers, and once tried to return a half-eaten kebab because "it didn't taste of hope" - has distilled four decades of professional poverty into one glorious, sweary masterpiece.
Inside these sacred pages you'll learn:
- How to terrorise the supermarket into giving you food for pennies (yellow-sticker warfare tactics that border on performance art)
- Why designer clothes are the biggest con since your ex said "it's not you, it's me"
- The ancient art of turning a ? Tesco wardrobe into a lifestyle that says "I've given up, but I look oddly confident about it"
- How to date, drink, and occasionally wash without accidentally acquiring a bank loan
- The joy of eating beans so often you start to feel emotionally attached to the tin
- Why "treat yourself" is the battle cry of the financially damned
- And most importantly: how to be absolutely brassic, completely unashamed, and weirdly bloody content about it
This book won't make you rich.
It'll make you the kind of broke that comes with dignity, a full belly of reduced chicken, and the smug satisfaction of knowing you've outlived every flash bastard who laughed at your ? trainers.
Perfect for:
- Blokes who check the price of milk like it's the bloody stock market
- Lads whose idea of interior design is "wherever the duct tape looks least obvious"
- Anyone who's ever cried in a car park clutching a 19p cauliflower like it's their newborn child
Warning: May cause uncontrollable nodding, involuntary cackling, and an overwhelming urge to cancel your gym membership because "walking saves petrol".A Bloke's Guide to Saving Money - because being skint never felt so bloody triumphant. Now sod off and start saving, you beautiful, miserly legend.
